Think back to the last time you’ve met a charismatic person. Chances are you felt at ease in their presence, immediately liked them and felt captivated by their charm. While charisma might seem like an inherent trait, it can be learned with a bit of practice. Use the tips listed below as a guide to become more charismatic.
1. Listen More, Talk Less
Next time you are in a conversation, completely listen to what the other person is saying — not selectively listening, but openly and honestly hearing each word. Wait several seconds until the person has finished speaking to respond. Avoid interruption. You’ll become more charismatic in no time.
An immediate response or interruption signals to the person you are speaking with you haven’t been fully listening to what they’ve been saying. To become more charismatic, embrace those several seconds of silence following their statement and use that time to formulate your response.
2. Be Present
Turn off the ringer on your cellphone and put it away. Make eye contact with the person you are speaking with and avoid the urge check your phone or people watch during your conversation. Focus on being present.
Not only is checking a cellphone mid-conversation rude and distracting, but it’s also a direct signal to the person you are speaking with that your phone is much more important to you than the conversation you are currently in.
3. Focus on Others
Open your conversations with questions focused on the individual or people you’re having a conversation with. Show a genuine interest in what they have to say. Rather than discuss your achievements at length, ask them to share their own experiences, passions or success stories.
Shifting the focus of the conversation from yourself to those you are speaking with shows them you are genuinely interested in who they are. When you combine this with active listening and engagement, they will feel as though you sincerely value their opinion.
4. Stay Positive
Steer clear of sharing gossip as well as complaints or negative views of others. If you notice a conversation taking this turn, don’t engage. While gossiping can be entertaining, it breeds mistrust and leads others to question what you’re sharing about them when they’re not around.
Studies also show that people naturally gravitate toward those more predisposed towards optimism. Interjecting positive statements into conversations and avoiding negativity will encourage those around you to do the same.
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5. Remain Energetic
Being around people with good energy is uplifting. To amp yourself up, concentrate on what makes you passionate about your next presentation or career.
Others will sense your passion and naturally be drawn to the good vibes you’re radiating.
6. Remember Names
The next time someone tells you their name, repeat it back to them. Repeat it to yourself several times and commit it to memory. During conversations, use their name now and then.
Making an effort to remember someone’s name goes a long way, it shows you value them as a person and feel they are worth remembering.
Being relaxed makes you easier to be around — you’ll have a calming effect on others. Just don’t get too relaxed.
To help get yourself into a relaxed state, take deep breaths and remain confident in your own skin. Wear clothing you feel comfortable in to avoid excess fidgeting. Practice meditation to calm your nerves or reduce your caffeine intake. If you fidget and twist uncomfortably when speaking with others, it may come across as impatience or boredom.
8. Be Aware of Your Body Language
Your eyes, posture, gestures and facial expressions are the non-verbal cues that tell people precisely what you are thinking, even if you say something different.
Be mindful of the way you carry yourself and your body language when you engage with others.
Charisma can be well within your reach. Practice the eight strategies listed above, and you’ll be well on your way in no time.
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