7 Positive Self-Talk Tips That Will Fuel Your Confidence
Many people struggle with self-esteem occasionally. Whether you’re getting ready for a big presentation or searching for the courage to go about your typical day, self-confidence gives you the fuel to face challenges and persevere.
So, a chronic lack of self-confidence can leave you feeling helpless and dissatisfied. That is where positive self-talk comes in handy.
Positive self-talk helps people banish bullying inner thoughts and regain confidence. All you have to do to use this method is to replace negative thoughts with positive ones out loud. Though you may feel hesitant about talking to yourself, research suggests doing so can effectively increase self-esteem and improve performance under pressure.
Here are seven easy self-talk tips you can use to boost your confidence and empower yourself to do great things.
1. Identify Negative Language
Before you can start using positive self-talk, you may need to identify negative patterns in your thoughts. Often, we develop negative thought patterns in childhood, based on things parents, adults and other children tell us. Those patterns may stick around and skew our perceptions into adulthood.
Begin to pay close attention to negative thoughts that pop into your head. If you notice yourself making a negative statement or assumption, like people think I’m annoying, for example, catch the thought by thinking or saying, “Stop.”
Over time, you’ll start to recognize your negative thought patterns, allowing you to stop and replace them with more positive alternatives.
2. Say Positive Affirmations
Positive affirmations are statements people repeat to bolster their self-confidence and replace negative thoughts. Examples of positive affirmations could include statements like I speak with confidence or I fully accept myself. You can make your own affirmations or draw comfort from the words of others.
Affirmations work best when they become second nature and come to you in times of stress. Try repeating a few positive statements every morning to establish a routine.
3. Leave Reminders for Yourself
Sometimes you need an external reminder to be kind to yourself. Try leaving yourself notes on the mirror or in other locations around your home to remind you how awesome you are.
These could be sticky note messages with nice words like “You’re beautiful” or “You can do this!” Small reminders could give you a confidence boost in certain difficult locations, such as at your desk or in front of a mirror.
4. Use Distancing Language
Whenever you need a pep talk, consider practicing positive self-talk in the second or third person. Research has shown people who use distancing language are more likely to show themselves support when compared to people who talk to themselves using “I” pronouns.
When you talk to yourself using “you” or your name, your self-talk mimics encouragement from a neutral third party, which can give you an extra sense of assurance. Give this a try next time you need confidence in a stressful situation.
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5. Replace Limiting Words With Possibility
Research indicates having negative expectations can lead to negative performance, so it’s essential to avoid limiting words in your self-talk. Words that limit possibility, like “never,” “always” and “can’t,” may act like self-fulfilling prophecies.
Replace limiting language with words that open up new opportunities, like “not yet,” “sometimes” and “can.”
6. Make Neutral Observations
Exaggerated words can make you feel worse about your situation and yourself. Instead of reaching for words with negative emotional connotations when describing a situation, choose neutral words instead.
For example, replace words like “horrible” with “unfortunate” and “hate” with “dislike.” Take special care to use neutral language when referring to yourself.
7. Be Kind to Yourself
This tip may seem self-evident, but it’s important to remember nonetheless. The point of positive self-talk is to improve the way you think and feel about yourself, so you should always try to treat yourself with kindness and respect.
As a general rule, only say things about yourself that you would feel comfortable saying about a close friend. You are your own best friend, after all.
Grow Your Self-Confidence
Overcoming bullying thoughts can be difficult, but using positive affirmations can help you begin the process. By treating yourself with the kindness you deserve and practicing these tips for positive self-talk, you can improve your confidence and take your life back into your capable hands.
Remember: You can do this!
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Also published on Medium.
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